Kiri ☂ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
taotrooper) wrote2006-03-26 03:30 pm
taotrooper) wrote2006-03-26 03:30 pm
Writing blues
Second time I get in "probation" at ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
30_kisses. After all, RP was eating a lot of time and creativity cells, so I shouldn't be surprised.
However, sometimes I wonder if I should just screw it all and resign for this challenge. Not only I've been hogging the Clow/Yuuko couple, but I only reply with one shitty, unbeta'ed fic every two months, made in a rush. Lately, all my XXXHOLiC fics end up being crack, even the ones which were supposed to be romantic.
Timed challenges might not be good for me. They're stressful. My English isn't even so good to make the pairing justice. I'm too random. And the themes, while they might be great for comedy and randomness, they don't always work for kisses. This is due to a) my vision of the couple and b) the metacanon vision of the couple. The kiss part, even if it's just in the cheek, or it's something material associated with the word (thimbles, Hershey's chocolates...), feels almost always forced when you see the flow of the rest of the fic.
And while I shouldn't compare myself to the rest of the fandom at LJ or the other writers at the Pit, it feels bad I almost never get reviews or recs, in comparison to other C/W writers. Yes, I should be used to not getting feedback except for the same five persons at LJ. Yes, most of them are better than me, like Laurus. But I don't know. I need to know what's wrong with my one-shots, besides grammar. And also, the first chapter is, chronologically, the worst one of the lot. Perhaps readers think they're all that bad and they get scared.
The time restriction isn't helping. The RP isn't helping. The themes attached to the "there most be a kiss" rule aren't helping. The small amount of concrit isn't helping.
I should either
a) quit 30_kisses and try another challenge instead
b) delete the fic from my ff.net account and upload the themes in order when I'm done and they're all beta'ed.
c) do both
30_kisses. After all, RP was eating a lot of time and creativity cells, so I shouldn't be surprised.However, sometimes I wonder if I should just screw it all and resign for this challenge. Not only I've been hogging the Clow/Yuuko couple, but I only reply with one shitty, unbeta'ed fic every two months, made in a rush. Lately, all my XXXHOLiC fics end up being crack, even the ones which were supposed to be romantic.
Timed challenges might not be good for me. They're stressful. My English isn't even so good to make the pairing justice. I'm too random. And the themes, while they might be great for comedy and randomness, they don't always work for kisses. This is due to a) my vision of the couple and b) the metacanon vision of the couple. The kiss part, even if it's just in the cheek, or it's something material associated with the word (thimbles, Hershey's chocolates...), feels almost always forced when you see the flow of the rest of the fic.
And while I shouldn't compare myself to the rest of the fandom at LJ or the other writers at the Pit, it feels bad I almost never get reviews or recs, in comparison to other C/W writers. Yes, I should be used to not getting feedback except for the same five persons at LJ. Yes, most of them are better than me, like Laurus. But I don't know. I need to know what's wrong with my one-shots, besides grammar. And also, the first chapter is, chronologically, the worst one of the lot. Perhaps readers think they're all that bad and they get scared.
The time restriction isn't helping. The RP isn't helping. The themes attached to the "there most be a kiss" rule aren't helping. The small amount of concrit isn't helping.
I should either
a) quit 30_kisses and try another challenge instead
b) delete the fic from my ff.net account and upload the themes in order when I'm done and they're all beta'ed.
c) do both