taotrooper: It's a polar bear dancing the hula; your argument is invalid (at dawn)
Kiri ☂ ([personal profile] taotrooper) wrote2004-09-05 11:31 pm
Entry tags:

Drabble...

Tried to write in English. Hehehe. Please, I want constructive critics. If there are grammar or spelling errors, PLEASE TELL ME! I'm just practicing before showing my neck to people...

Title: The ones without a name
Fandom: Card Captor Sakura, as usual.
Canon: Manga. Only manga. Oh, and it's way precanon, as usual.
Pairings: n/a
Characters: Eriol (as usual) and chibi!Fujitaka
Words: 2278


In the middle of my last spell, I realized something: it was not working the way it was supposed to be. Not enough magic, clearly. I felt lighter, and a pain of death took over me and tear my conscience out.

**********


The blue-haired boy opened his eyes. The sight of the dark living room was blurry, and the shadows seemed to dance at the moonlight. Outside the house, it was snowing.

He sat down in order to examine the results. First, he concentrated on himself. Indeed, there was no change in his enormous powers. The wizard had achieved in the soul partition, alright. The real goal of the spell had not, though. The blue-haired boy swore in a whisper. His old visions had failed him, how frustrating.

Then he stood up and focused on the brown-haired boy, who was sleeping on the floor. Like the blue-haired boy expected, his other self had almost zero magic energy and no presence whatsoever. He reckoned that half wasn't even able to detect the simplest psychic halo; not even a sorcerer, not even a ghost, absolutely nothing.

No time left for regrets, however. The sun was about to rise, and the second part of the last spell was about to be activated. The blue-haired boy took the brown-haired boy on his arms. It was a little heavy for that body, but he could lift him. He started walking towards a secret chamber, so well hidden than not even his guardians had ever discovered it. There were only two beds in it. He put the brown-haired boy on one of them. He felt relieved and so tired. He still couldn't believe the reincarnation went wrong...

The blue-haired boy laid on the second bed and closed his eyelids. He was able to feel it, the magic surrounding him in embrace. Finally, it was the moment to meet Morpheus. The chamber sealed itself with a defensive charm: the children would not be found or bothered by anyone for some decades; resting in peace, but alive, just dormant. Yes, sleeping would be nice, he murmured to himself. It might heal the sorrow in his heart, coming from his recent death. Mentally, he said good-bye to his creations again, and then he lost himself on a lethargic state.


Did I mention I've never written in English before? ;_; It's normal it sucks, so I won't be mad if you guys are honest.

[identity profile] laurus-nobilis.livejournal.com 2004-09-06 12:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Ooh, interesting! I liked it a lot, and I'd love to see what happens next... I noticed they don't have names yet. Hmm.

I like your theory, too; it would explain why Kero says he spent so much time in the book (without him being too much of a liar, that is :P).

And don't worry about your writing in English! You do it really well :)